How acknowledging your natural advantage as an introvert leads to significant progress
Jessica is a literary scholar, reviewer, and published author. When Jessica started the coaching program, she aimed to improve her personal writing process. She often got stuck writing a scientific article that was part of her doctoral research. Additionally, she struggled with balancing her entrepreneurial side with her energy needs as an introvert
In a 1-1 coaching program, Jessica discovered that her natural habit style is the Painter’s Palette, where enthusiasm and flexibility are essential for getting important things done while still retaining energy at the end of the day. Working with her natural advantage, Jessica excels in connecting the worldviews of others and ensuring they are seen appropriately. She maps out various stakeholders and their interests in detail, finding solutions that best align with their interests.
Division between introversion and extraversion
I noticed a clear division between introversion and extraversion through the question: do you gain energy from social contact or do you lose energy from it? When I'm social or in a group, I'm very lively and enthusiastic and I share my opinions. I contribute and engage in conversations. Which seems like extraverted skills. But afterwards, I feel incredibly drained and sometimes need days or even weeks to recover. This made me realize that social interactions actually deplete my energy, confirming my introversion.
The way of communicating
The way that introverts and extroverts communicate also stood out to me. I sometimes needed more time to process things. Conversations with others often leave a strong impression on me, and it takes time to catch up. At the moment, I respond spontaneously and intuitively, but my intuition drains a lot of energy and afterwards I’m exhausted.
Recognition
We had met before, so I already had a good impression of Mariella before seeing her posts. Her energy, which is calm and genuine, is evident in her video messages. She doesn't come across as someone trying to sell something. Instead, she shares her discoveries about herself and wants to share this with others who are similar. I recognized myself in this.
In her posts and video sessions, I saw things I related to, such as repeating the conversations you had during the day, at night. Various examples made me think, "Hey, this sounds like me." I followed the videos passively for a while, but when she started offering masterclasses, I saw an interactive opportunity and joined the free try-out.
Interacting with authors
My job involves reading, interacting with authors, texts, and characters at my own pace. However, in real-world interactions, information can be overwhelming. I pick up emotionally charged information from non-verbal communication, which I process later.
Entrepreneurial spirit
I noticed that while I am quite entrepreneurial, I am introverted in my interactions and how I handle stimuli. Mariella’s social media posts piqued my curiosity about how I could activate my entrepreneurial side while leaving room for my personality.
Natural process
The community aspect drew me in, and I became a fan of the natural flow concept. It was cool to see how different people move from A to B in a project. I was impressed by Mariella's analysis of my natural advantage and work process steps during our first session.
During my time at university, I wrote within a structured environment with a promoter and myself as a student. But I had trouble making a connection with readers and other authors through writing. I couldn’t really communicate my research results, because of this issue I had. I was used to delve into the writing of other authors and to build a mental world out of the theories and ideas of the other. But I then couldn’t communicate my own mental world because the conversation had become too big in my own head.
My natural process differs from how research and writing are traditionally taught. Through the natural advantage model and sessions with Mariella, I realized it’s okay that my approach is slightly different from what is typically taught.
Frameworks
I benefit from structuring things in text. I copied my natural advantage and created my own scheme, which gave me a lot of support, combined with the Win of the Day. The Win of the Day helped me a lot, but my natural advantage provided a framework within which I could map my professional contributions with others. It helped me to better understand the value of my introverted skillset.
I had written a lot before, but always within the structure of my own mind. Once I clarified my natural focus, I knew what I wanted to say and could translate it into an article. I then wrote 3000 words in two days in the right structure.
Clarity
When I clarified my natural focus—what drives me when I'm in flow—I suddenly knew why I write articles. I now understand why I connect with a reader and what I want to convey in a text.
Before, I always got stuck in the research phase, endlessly associating ideas. I would place everything in a structure on paper, but the next step of connecting with the reader was missing. I didn’t know how to organize my text to maintain that connection.
By clarifying my natural focus and considering the questions Mariella asked, this became much easier.
Significant benefits
The program brought me many benefits. It helped to vent about things I worried about and struggled with. Speaking out had a cathartic effect. Additionally, being able to talk creatively and freely helped. Mariella’s questions made me better understand my challenges and why they existed.
In Mariella’s program, I learned that this “worldbuilding” was an aspect of my natural advantage. In her program, I was in control, the approach was much more personal, and the focus was on how I naturally engage with others, which resulted in a better understanding and acceptance of my worldbuilding skills.
Other programs provided a model of how people write, but this program was fundamentally different because of this central focus on how you naturally engage with others. The program was immensely beneficial Because it taught me to embrace my need for dialogue as being part of my natural advantage.
It also shed light on my inner critic. While writing, it felt like I was imposing expectations on myself, like a dark cloud of internal criticism hanging over me. Understanding my natural advantage and its focus on considering others, helped me better place this self-criticism. I realized I was punishing myself because I wanted to do well for others.
Positive collaboration
I appreciate Mariella's introversion and dedication. I admire how she prioritizes her family and well-being despite having a great career, choosing priorities that make her happy. She listens and allows space for the other’s pace, which I find crucial. Mariella understands that silences and spaces are information moments and processing time, making me feel very comfortable.
I found the collaboration very pleasant. If I met someone with the same problem as mine—overwhelmed by social interactions but wanting to be entrepreneurial and expand—I would definitely recommend this program.
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About the author
Mariella Franker, PhD is a former molecular biologist, scientific writer and editor. She co-founded the Scientific & Medical Writers Network in Benelux.
In 2022, she became a certified Natural Advantage® coach. She now teaches introverts how to use Personal Pillar Habits to get more energy and fulfillment from their career without overwhelm, exhaustion, or pretending to be someone they're not.
She's an associate coach at De Succesvolle Introvert and founder of The Franker Message. She's been featured in places such as Quiet and Strong podcast, Quietly Influential Summit, and MarieTV.
A first generation immigrant from South America, Mariella now lives in the Netherlands with her husband and son. On most days, you'll find her working in her home office or puttering around her garden.